The Softball Game of Doom
by MalonHunter
Summary: well... this is basically what happens when characters from tamora pierce, lord of the rings, zelda.... and a lot of others play a game of softball.... .... .....


The Softball Game of Doom  
  
  
  
"We will, we will Rock you!" the crowd chanted, "We will, we will ROCK YOU!!!"  
  
"Here we are at the beginning of the Softball Game of Doom!" Sage said into the microphone, "MalonHunter and I are your hosts!"  
  
"That's right- NO GANNY, NO! DON'T HURT 'EM YET!!!" MalonHunter yelled, "Er- we appear to be having some technical difficulties- NO GANNY! SIT!"  
  
"As you can tell, the teams are moving out onto the field- NO FISH! IF I'VE TOLD YOU ONCE, I'VE TOLD YOU 1000 TIMES- NO BIG WORDS!" Sage yelled.  
  
"On Team 1, we have Fi- er- Numair, Daine, George (not from Harry Potter), the Japanese dude, Marth, Link, Alanna, the psycho in the wheelchair, Professor X, Mr. Debreceni, Legolas and Merry." MalonHunter said.  
  
"And on Team 2, there is evil himself, Ganondorf, her royal prissiness in pink, Zelda, Beast, the Elton John impersonator, Rauru, the other Japanese dude, Roy, Gambit, Ms. Jensen, Kyr, Obi-Wan, and Pippin." Sage said, "Geez, what a line-up!"  
  
"Yesiree, even the bases are famous. These Gorons have traveled all the way from Death Mountain to take part in this momentous event." MalonHunter said.  
  
"And here comes our Ump, Cyclops! May we have a round of boos in his honor?" Sage said, taking out a bucket of tomatoes, "Mwahahha!"  
  
"BOOOOOOOO!" the crowd yelled.  
  
"Get off the field!" Munchie yelled from the stands.  
  
The tomatoes soon covered Cyke, thanks to everyone's favorite announcers.  
  
"So, that done, we must now flip a coin to decide who shall bat first, seeing as how there is no home team," MalonHunter said, "Cyclops, if you will?"  
  
Cyclops walked out between the two teams, who were thinking up evil things to do to one another, and held up a coin, "Now I want you to play fair!"  
  
"I'll play fair," Numair growled, lip curling, "fair as in that's where they'll belong after I'm through with them!"  
  
"Fair?" Ganondorf yelled, "Numair, what is fair to the right hand of evil?"  
  
"Yeah, yeah," MalonHunter muttered, walking up, "Unfortunately for you, I am evil, and I still have my right hand." Turning to Cyclops she said, "You're going to toss that coin right now or I'll know why…"  
  
"Why do you have to be so dratted bossy?" Cyclops whined, "I'd get to it eventually!"  
  
He tossed the coin into the air, where it stayed.  
  
MalonHunter looked around suspiciously, and, seeing Numair and Ganondorf glaring at the coin, muttering something, she promptly kicked both in the shins- HARD.  
  
Both yelled some naughty words as the coin landed, heads side up.  
  
"What does heads stand for?" Mr. D asked.  
  
"Fuji pala ara sabu!" Roy yelled.  
  
"Oshi boke muhtai no!" Marth retorted.  
  
Roy unsheathed his sword, "Idye!" Marth kicked out, drawing his sword, preparing for an attack.  
  
"Stop!" Sage came running out onto the field, "Heads stands for Team 1, because they all have heads!"  
  
"They wouldn't've if you'd have let them duke it out…" MalonHunter muttered, smirking.  
  
Everyone stared at her.  
  
"Geez…. Everyone's a critic!" she mumbled, walking off, "Why do they expect me to be nice all the time?"  
  
"Never mind that," Sage took a deep breath, "PLAY BALL!!!"  
  
"So," MalonHunter said, once again in the Announcer position, "After that little problem, Team 1 is taking their positions. There's Numair as pitcher- NO! NUMAIR… DON'T!!!!!! ONLY THROW THE BALL! Not magic… umm… can we get medical attention for Zelda, the catcher that's half blown up? Yeah? Ok…. Whew…."  
  
"Yes indeed…. I shudder to think what would happen to the Umpire if I don't win…" Numair said, smiling evilly.  
  
"Anyway, Team 2's first batter, Beast, is up!" Sage yelled, inching away from the .  
  
"Now, considering the equations for velocity, pitch, not to mention the medium the ball is traveling through…" Beast muttered to himself. He took a few practice swings, still trying to figure out whatever it was he was figuring.  
  
"Ok, BATTER UP!!!" Cyclops yelled. Seeing his cue, Beast stepped up to the plate, not seeing the menacing glare of Numair Salmalin, the greatest mage anywhere, who was secretly planning to reduce the size of Beast's team 'on accident.'  
  
Unknown to all but a few, Numair would never get to throw the first pitch.  
  
"Alright, do we have everything?" Munchie asked, hiding under the bleachers.  
  
"I think so… but Master, why are we doing this?" Anakin, Munchie's Padawan learner asked.  
  
"Because I am the great Munchie, the one and only Crazed Crazy Fan!" Munchie yelled, "Or at least because this softball game needs a little spice!"  
  
"But what about the players? They look tough…" Anakin mumbled.  
  
"IT STILL NEEDS SPICE!!!!" Munchie yelled, taking out a bazooka, "Let's get to work!"  
  
The two ran out onto the field, blasting away.  
  
"Ack!" Zelda screeched, "I broke a nail!" She fainted at the sight of her own blood.  
  
"My hair! OH, my glorious hair- it's ruined!!!" Cyke sobbed.  
  
"It also appears to be flammable!" Numair said, dodging blasts of energy as Cyke's hair burst into flames.  
  
Suddenly, the fire stopped. Everyone looked up to see MalonHunter with the bazookas in hand, glaring at Munchie and her Padawan.  
  
"If I were you, I would be running away before someone blows you up!" Sage warned.  
  
Munchie and Anakin stood there, frozen with terror.  
  
"That means run." MalonHunter muttered.  
  
Munchie darted off, yelling, "I'll get you for this!!! And you're little game to!!!"  
  
Will she get them and their little game?  
  
TO BE CONTINUED… 


End file.
